Free printable
Funeral Wishes Worksheet: Free Printable
By Jason Su · Updated October 9, 2026
Most families plan a service in the first three days, while they are still in shock. Whatever is written down before that is the only thing that survives the week — and the single most useful line on this sheet is not the hymn list. It is the list of things your family does not have to buy.
This sheet gives you a place to write both: the service you would want, and the choices the law already leaves open to whoever is arranging it.
What the law already gives your family
These come from the Federal Trade Commission’s Funeral Rule, which applies to funeral homes (FTC):
- No packages. You have the right to buy separate goods and services. You do not have to accept a bundle that includes things you do not want.
- Prices on the phone. A funeral director must give you price information over the telephone if you ask. You do not have to give your name or address first.
- A written price list to keep. On a visit, the funeral home must hand you a General Price List listing every item and its cost.
- Your own casket or urn. A funeral provider cannot refuse to handle a casket or urn you bought elsewhere, or charge a fee for it.
- No routine embalming. No state requires embalming for every passing. Refrigeration is often an acceptable alternative, and direct cremation or immediate burial requires no preservation at all.
- A written statement before you pay, listing each item you selected and its price.
One thing to know about the last point: the FTC’s rules cover funeral homes, not cemeteries without an on-site funeral home, and not third-party casket sellers. Cemetery requirements are where the surprises usually are.
The sheet
The service I would want
| Question | Answer |
|---|---|
| Burial, cremation, or direct cremation | |
| Where it would take place | |
| Who should lead or speak | |
| Music, readings, or prayers | |
| Open casket, private viewing, or neither | |
| What I would like to be dressed in | |
| Flowers, or donations instead | |
| Anything I specifically do not want |
What to tell the funeral director
| Item | Our choice |
|---|---|
| We already own a casket, urn, or plot | |
| Where those papers are kept | |
| Embalming: yes, no, or ask about refrigeration | |
| Container for cremation | |
| Who is authorized to make decisions and pay | |
| Budget we are comfortable with | |
| Whether we want the written statement itemized |
What my family will need
| Item | Where it is |
|---|---|
| Certificate copies ordered (see the checklist below) | |
| Military discharge papers (DD-214), if applicable | |
| Life insurance policy number | |
| Burial plot deed or cremation plan | |
| Where this sheet is kept | |
| Who to call first |
How to use it
- Fill in the first table in your own words. A sentence beats a form. “Cremation, no service, scatter at the lake” is a complete answer.
- Circle the items you would decline. This is the part that saves your family money and argument at the counter.
- Write down the documents and where they live. See the Document Inventory if nothing is written down yet.
- Tell one person where this sheet is. A sheet nobody can find is the same as no sheet.
- Revisit it after any change — a move, a marriage, a new diagnosis.
Frequently asked
Is a pre-paid funeral plan a good idea?
It can be, and it is a different document from this one. Pre-paid contracts are regulated under state law rather than the Funeral Rule, so ask what happens if the funeral home closes, whether the price is locked, and whether it can be transferred. Read the cancellation terms before signing.
Should this be in my will?
It can be mentioned there, but a will is often read too late to guide a service in the first three days. Keep this sheet where the family will look first, and tell them it exists.
What if my family wants something different?
They usually get the final say, and that is reasonable. This sheet is a strong preference, not a binding instruction — but it removes the worst part, which is guessing.
Next step
Fill in the first table today, in pencil. Then put this sheet in the same place as your other papers and tell one person.
For what happens right after a passing, see the first week checklist and how to order the certified copies. When the family is ready to write the notice, there is a separate guide to writing an obituary.
This is a record sheet, not legal advice. Funeral rules, cemetery requirements, and pre-paid contract terms differ by state — confirm the details with the funeral home and, for a contract, with a licensed attorney in your state.